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The morning I couldn't pray.

Jun 03, 2023

One morning I was trying to pray but kept thinking of all the things happening in my life that were weighing on me. 

I kept getting frustrated as I was trying to pray about each situation, but you know how one thought leads to another, then to another, and then you’re playing out scenarios in your head and find yourself not praying at all? That was me.

I would catch myself and start praying again, only for it to happen a few more times.  I found myself apologizing to God each time. 

Suddenly, I had a vision.

I was at the altar and I had a bunch of bags with me. As I was kneeling there, I was not praying, but instead I unzipped the bag and removed what looked like coal or rocks.

I took out the dirty coal and placed it on the altar. 

As soon as I placed it on the altar it turned into a flower!

When I picked it back up to look at it, it was a coal again.

I smiled as I realized what was happening and continued to take them out of my bags and place them ALL on the altar creating a beautiful bouquet. 

Suddenly Isaiah 61:3 came to mind:

To console those who mourn in Zion,
To give them beauty for ashes,
The oil of joy for mourning,
The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;
That they may be called trees of righteousness,
The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.

“He gives beauty for ashes,” kept replaying in my head. 

He gives beauty for ashes.

What we think is a problem, what we are trying to figure out on our own, the worst-case scenarios we play in our heads, God is saying, "Give it to Me. Watch what I can do with it." 

In my hands it looked ugly, but when I gave my heavy rocks to God, it instantly turned into something beautiful.

The more we give to Him, the more He can create with it. But we have to be able to let it go and let God.

Nothing is ever wasted. Romans 8:28 says:

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Read it again. All things work together for good for those that love God.

Not some things - God doesn’t rifle through our messes and pick and choose what will work. No, ALL things will work for good! 

Needless to say, after seeing this vision I started to pray with intention. I started to lay it all out.

I felt comforted knowing that no matter what happened, He was in control and He had a purpose.  Once I laid it all out to him, I didn’t think about it again. I didn’t want to pick my heaviness back up.

I am leaving it all at the altar to watch the beauty God creates.

I pray today that we all let go and let God.

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